Life is not about making good choices in order to get good things. It's about admitting what you want and not being afraid to take it.

I open the dining room door, I open the living room door, I then open the bathroom praying that my husband isn't sitting there taking one of his monster shits. I do this so that the air-conditioning... more

shane: why are you here in our house mr wilson? where is your family?
doug: my family left me buddy, my life's a toilet. these corn flakes, they're old. my asshole is on fire. i hate myself. happy... more

hello phone caller this is andrew, andrew botwin. it pains me we couldn't make this instant human conection, leave a message and while you do it, imagine me listening to it where i might be at the... more

are those pepitas? i love pepitas!

nancy: why are you taking pictures?!
celia: i...i.. was.... scrapbooking?

celia: my cell mate chita says she's gonna make me her special girl.

Dean: Do you think it's safe to take two ambien?
Celia: I think you should take the whole bottle.

Dean: Bitch!
Celia: Perhaps.

something happens today, something else will happen tomorrow