Shane: (if she had a penis for 24 hours) I would pee, standing up on every bush I could find.
Dana: That's all you would do. Just pee.
Shane: Yep.
Jenny: You really wouldn't try to fuck a lot of... more

Most girls are straight... 'til they're not.

(Alice to Shane) Yoda needs to give me some better advice or Yoda needs to shut the fuck up!

Tina: Maybe she's a different kind of lesbian.

Alice: Yeah, the straight kind!

Shane: Sexuality is fluid. Whether you're gay, or you're straight or you're bisexual -- you just go with the flow.

She's a spaghetti girl. Straight until wet.

Carmen: Oh, listen to this. Monogamy is common among birds.
Shane: That's great 'cause I love birds.
Carmen: It is the practice of having a single mate during a period of time. Does that... mean... more

Shane: I like a girl with ambition.

Carmen: Fuck you.

Shane: If you want.

People always tend to let you down, that's why I try not to need anything from anyone.

Liquor in the front. Poker in the rear