FBI Agent: And remember, you can never be Harry Monroe again. Any questions?



Darnell: Do I still like cheese?

FBI Agent: Not if you want to stay alive, you don't.

Crabman: Hey Earl,
Earl: Hey Crabman.

(When Earli is being accused of kidnapping on TV)

Darnell: I don't know if he's watching, but in case he is, HEY EARL!

Earl (unenthusiastically): Hey, Crab Man.

Darnell: Hey, Rodney, you're not a cop. Cops don't sell fake watches out of their truck.
Joy: [looks at her watch] Dammit! I THOUGHT that said Cucci!

Street smart is just something dumb people say when they want to use the word smart to describe themselves.

Darnell: I don't like having sex in a walk-in freezer. It's cold in there but we still get sweaty. Last time my balls got stuck to a keg of beer.

Darnell: Ok. My real name is Harry Monroe, and the witness protection program moved me to Camden County because there was a mix up in the paper work. Some tobacco company executive ended up in... more

Darnell: You know, Joy, technically that licence is state property. Doesn't belong to either one of you.
Joy: Okay, Darnell… You're painting a turtle right now and I'm not taking legal advice from... more

Randy: Hey Darnell, do you ever tell your sister that you love her?
Darnell: I said it once when I thought she was dead. She was just past out from low blood sugar. I'm still glad I said it. Now... more

Joy: My deaf lawyer said that if I could pass a lie detector test saying I didn't steal that truck, it'll help my case. So I stole this old one from a swap-meet.
Darnell: Don't try to explain the... more