Wilson: Tim, are you familiar with the I-Ching?
Tim: Sure. The itching, the scratching, the chafing. That's why I switched to boxers, my friend.
Wilson: No... No, actually, the I-Ching is the... more

Randy Taylor: Hey Wilson. What you doing?
Wilson: Roasting my nuts!!
Randy Taylor: That must of hurt.

Jill: Tim, Can you come down here? I have to talk to you.
Tim: Again?
Jill: Yeah.
Tim: OK, what did you do now?
Wilson: Heidey-ho neighbors.
Jill: Never mind, I'll talk to Wilson instead.
Tim: You... more

Wilson: Tim, it is not easy to change one's perception of things, but it can be very healthy. Some people might even say it's a growth experience.
Tim: Wilson, how far does this go? How do I really... more

Wilson: What I'm trying to say is that most people think the best way to get rid of a wart is to cut it off, but in actuality that isn't the best solution. See, the wart will reappear because the... more

Tim: I do things with both of the guys, you know. Brad and I like to go to sporting events, work on the Hot Rod and build stuff with my tools. Randy and I joke. I make jokes, he makes jokes, we make... more

Tim: Helping my mom move will allow me to do something I've always wanted to do.
Wilson: Spend more time with her?
Tim: No, drive a really big truck!

Wilson: Maybe the good doctor has ESP.
Tim: What does having a cable sports channel have to do with this?

Wilson: Have you thought about what you'll study in college?
Brad: Yeah, I think about it all the time.
Wilson: Besides girls.
Brad: Then, no.

Tim: Wilson, are you naked?
Wilson: No, Tim, I am wearing a hat.