Al: Ilene!
Tim: Of course you lean. You're lopsided.

"Remember the weather report for today: chili today, hot tamale!"

Al: I think one of these days, you're going to run out of flannel jokes.
Tim: I don't think so, Al. Not with my "Complete Flannel Joke Book".
"Why did the flannel cross the road?... more

Al: Merry Christmas. You know, Christmas always reminds me of my childhood. I used to build a snowman every year. I used a carrot for its nose. Cookies for its eyes. Licorice for its smile.
Tim:... more

Al: Last night, something very disturbing happened: Ilene...had a dream.
Tim: No! Not a dream! While she was sleeping? I don't know, scientists may want to study her.

I don't think so, Tim.

Jill: That's not what you think, is it, Tim?
Tim: It's not?
Jill: No.
Al: What DO you think?
Tim: I don't know, ask her.

"I'd better go before the Putt-Putt is shut-shut."

"We'll be right back from this commercial break after we medicate our host."

Al: Oh, I see. That wasn't in the plans either. While this buzzer sends thousands of volts coursing through my body while he stands back and says, 'Remember the AL-amo!" Then comes the... more