Blanche: What do you think of my new dress? Is it me?
Sophia: It's too tight, it's too short and shows too much cleavage for a woman your age.
Dorothy: Yes, Blanche. It's you.

Sophia: Rose, just remember, you're smarter than people say you are. You've got good sense, and you know what you're doing.
Rose: Oh, Sophia.
Sophia: Blanche, you're a slut.
Blanche: Oh, Sophia.

Sophia: Ow.
Dorothy: What is it, Ma?
Sophia: Pain.
Dorothy: What kind of pain?
Sophia: The kind that hurts.
Rose: This reminds me of something that happened back in St. Olaf.
Dorothy: Oh, Rose,... more

Rose: A baby! She's going to have a baby!

Sophia: And if it's a boy she can name it after it's father; Rick, Joe, Bob, Don, Dave!

Blanche: These things don't happen to people like me! They happen to people named...Petrillo!

Sophia: Hey! No one in my family ever, EVER....left a body to be found!

Sophia: I give to all my children! Except Phil...

Dorothy: Why not Phil?!

Sophia: Because! He never calls, he never writes. The only time I hear from him is at Christmas when he sends me a... more

Dorothy: Well, if someone asked me to sail around the world with him, I'd say yes.
Sophia: Sail around the world? Please, you can't even get someone to ask you for a date. Sail around the world.... more

Sophia: Make way for the victors.
Rose: You won the big game?
Sophia: No, Rose. We lost and we all changed our names to Victor.

Sophia: Blanche, a terrible thing has happened to you. But when life does something like this, there are a couple of things you got to remember. You got your health, right?
Blanche: Yeah.
Sophia:... more

So she likes girls and not guys. Some people like cats and not dogs. Frankly, I'd rather live with a lesbian than a cat.