I be like this [Whappah!]

"I got this!''

[after catching his daughter dating a teenage boy]
From now on, we're home schooling you. Whatever we don't know, you don't know. When did the Korean War start? I don't know, and neither do you!

(While teaching his son to play baseball):
"We're Mexi-cans not Mexi-can'ts."

"It's a wonderful day when white people black people and Hispanics all come together, to pick on another minority"

When I was 10 there wasnt trampolines and cartoon charaters, I never went to Chuck E Cheese! My mom said ' you wanna see a mouse pull the refrigerator Out!

Órale

I can never do nothing in this house!

WAPAAAAA!!!!

Shut up Bat.