carman is the girl you pick up after the prom when you drop off your real date".

MAX TO GEORGE:" DAD HOW MUCH ALLOWANCE DO I GET THIS WEEK"?

GEORGE TO MAX:"WHEN I WAS YOUNG I DIDN'T GET ALLOWANCE".

BENNY ENTERS: "YES YOU DID!!!"

GEORGE TO... more

(after Max gets a concussion)
Angie: Whats the capital of California?
Max: Sacramento
Angie: Good. What about Oklahoma?
Max: I don't know.
(Angie gasps and gives a worried look at... more

viva la raza!

but dad if your appendix is as big as your head it wont fit in grandpa!

[George]: From now on you can no longer use your hands
[Max]: Mom!
[Angie]: You heard your father, now go upstairs

[Max]: Whats a period?
[George]: A bullet we dodge

(Max and his "wife" get ready to leave for school. Angie brings a bag of brownies she made over to Max.)
Angie: Here honey. I made you fresh brownies for lunch.
Max: Thank you.
Girl: You... more

(Max is hitting on Carmen's friend Olivia)
Olivia: Your so cute. How old are you?
Max: See all these teeth? Permanent.

[george]
there now you can use the computer.
[max] finally
[george] you need a code to go on& only i know it.
[max] is it WAAPPPPAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[george] NOT ANYMORE!