Joey: Hey can you imagine if the chick and the duck had a baby? we could name it Chuck!

Chandler: ...or.. Dick.

Joey: Pheebs, you wanna help?
Phoebe: Oh, I wish I could, but I really don't want to.

Chandler: I'm not so good at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

Chandler: You're right. I have no excuses. I was totally over the line.
Joey: Over the line? You... you.. you're so far past the line that you can't even see the line! The line is a dot to you!

Chandler: What's PLEH
Joey: It's HELP, spelled backwards so that the helicopters can see it .

Joey: It's not like we agreed to live together forever. We're not Bert and Ernie.
Chandler: I'm aware we're not gay puppets.

First divorce: wife's hidden sexuality, not my fault. Second divorce: said the wrong name at the altar, a little my fault. Third divorce: they shouldn't let you get married when you're that drunk and... more

Rachel- "What would you give up, sex or food?"
Joey- "Food..No, Sex..Food..Sex..Food..Sex..OH GOD, I DONT KNOW, I WANT BOTH, I-I WANT GIRLS ON BREAD!"

Joey: "Hey Ross I got a science question. If the homosapians, were in fact HOMO-sapians, is that why they're extinct?"

Ross: "Joey, Homosapians are... people."

Joey:... more

Joey: I may only have a couple beers in me, but... I love you, man.

Chandler: I'm still on my first. I just think you're nice.