Mr. Kennie can go home, there's no known cure for being a pain in the ass.

Dear ER Gang, So here I am, out on the beach at 5:30 in the evening. Elizabeth is drinking juice, but I'm all about the Mai Tai's. The sun is going down, Rachel is dipping Ella's toes in the ocean as... more

Dr. Mark Greene: You set the tone, Carter.

People come in here and they're sick and dying and bleeding, and they need our help. Helping them is more important than how we feel

People come in here and they're sick and dying and bleeding, and they need our help. Helping them is more important than how we feel.

Patient: I have this hangnail and it's very painful

Mark Greene: I have a brain tumor. It's inoperable

Patient: What?

Mark Greene: I win.

[Mark] What’ve you got?
[Jerry] One Squirrel: DOA.

Randi: "Dr. Green...it's your father's nurse on the phone again"
Mark: "What does she want?"
Randi: "She says your father is making racial slurs"
Mark: "She's... more

Randi: How'd the personality test go?
Mark: I scored somewhere between serial killer and talk show host.

Mark: Mrs. Raskin. It's been a long time.
Mrs. Raskin: The service isn't what it used to be.
Mark: What seems to be the matter?
Mrs. Raskin: I have this hangnail, and it's very painful.
Mark:... more