ABBY!!! GET THE CRASHCART!!!!

Abby: Every once and a while, you'll have a really perfect cigarette, you know? Everything about it is perfect, the taste, the moment. Of course, 99% of the time it tastes like crap.

John: It causes... more

Oh, God! Benton's going to kill me. Betty, I can't help you now, I'm sorry. I'm late, and I am going to die soon.

Benton's slides were in the fire. They're toast. Why couldn't I have just been home at the time? I could've had smoke inhalation. I could be sucking air through a nice ET tube.

Carter: Hey, Maggie, you got anything good?

Doyle: Carol Hathaway dropped a clock on Weaver's head.

Carter: Deliberately?

Doyle: I'm foggy on the details.

Carter: Always nice to start off the morning with a round of gallstones. Follow me, men.

Anna: We call him Sergeant Sunshine.

Weaver: Carter! Take our friend here. I'm afraid I might stick an I.V. pole up his ass.

Carter: Wouldn't want that.

Carter: "Leonardo DiCaprio, hooped skirts and tragic love is kinda my idea of hell on Earth..."

Carter: "I can't believe I was that stupid!"

Greene: "I can-- You're a medical student."

[Of a senile old patient who kept asking about his dog...]

"At one point, he leaned in, pulled me close to him and whispered, 'Kibble, kibble, kibble, kibble'--It was utterly touching."