Ari (on Medellin): Let’s just talk reasonably, OK? Sometimes, things aren’t just meant to be. Sometimes, no matter how bad you want something, you gotta let it go. Senior year, all right, I was obsessed with Katie Sherman, the most insane tits.. Anyway, the moment I found out she gave half the football team crabs, it was done. Never thought about it again.

E: You’re saying Medillon has crabs, Ari?

Ari: Medellin has crabs, gonorrhea, syfillus, it is an untreatable super germ.