Eric: "Could you get laid without Vince, that's the question."
Turtle: "Do I give a fuck? That's the answer.

you know like when your jerkin it to a porno and they cut to a closeup of the guys face and you wanna kill yourself..

Drama: If my vagina could speak, what would it say?
Turtle: EAT ME!

I gotta wait for the cable guy today. How am I gonna do that with no weed?

Drama: If your vagina could talk, what would it say in two words?
Turtle: EAT ME!

E: could you get laid without vince, thats the question
Turtle: do i give a fuck, thats the answer

"Jesus Christ, Ari Gold. You just got demoted to Silver."

Turtle: This is where you should be living, Vince. In a kingdom, like a prince.
Eric: Don't you mean in a kingdom like a king, you idiot?
Vince: Nah, E. Everyone wants to kill the king. But the... more

Did you just get cock blocked by Bob Saget?

Drama: Come on, Turtle. Let's go work the waitress staff.
Turtle: Nah, fuck that. They just wheeled out the dessert cart.
Drama: Do-it-yourself sundaes? I'm in.
Turtle: Sprinkles...