Eric: What, Ari?!

Ari: I'm in bed, 'E', talk dirty to me!

Eric: It's five o'clock in the morning!

Ari: What are you wearing?

Eric: Fuck you!

Ari: I love when you say 'Fuck'! Say it again!

Ari: "I'm in bed E, talk dirty to me"
Eric: "its five o'clock in the morning"
Ari: "what are you wearing?"
Eric: "Fuck you!"
Ari: "I love it when you... more

Eric: We had breakup-sex, all right?
Johnny Drama: Breakup-sex? Never heard of it.
Eric: Yeah, I mean... you know... you have sex and... that's it - you say goodbye.
Johnny Drama: [pauses to... more

E: could you get laid without vince, thats the question
Turtle: do i give a fuck, thats the answer

Turtle: This is where you should be living, Vince. In a kingdom, like a prince.
Eric: Don't you mean in a kingdom like a king, you idiot?
Vince: Nah, E. Everyone wants to kill the king. But the... more

My two philosophies are: 1. You're a dick. And 2: When you realized that i'm right, you're gonna know you're a dick.

Ari: From now on ask my permission before you bang one of my assistants.
Eric: How'd you know that?
Ari: 'Cause I know all. And I could have told you that this would end badly. Now I gotta to fire... more

Ari: You read the New Republic?
Eric: I've heard of it.
Ari: Well I was reading that, and it's interesting because what it says is, you don't know what the FUCK you're talking about!

[Ari's at couples therapy with his wife, when his phone rings]
Ari: It's Vince, baby.
Mrs. Ari: I don't give a fuck!
Ari: Ok, what, so you know ah, after the year that i've had, i'm on the most... more

E: "Could you get laid without Vince, that's the question."

Turtle: "Do I give a fuck? That's the answer."