Sister Mary: "Money can't buy happiness."

Gabrielle: "Well, sure it can. That's just a lie we tell poor people to keep 'em from rioting.

Good friends support each other when something terrible happends. Great friends pretend nothing ever happened.

Gaby: Why are all rich men such jerks?
Carlos: The same reason all beautiful women are bitches.

Rich men dont marry virgins for the same reason they dont hire chauffeurs who cant drive ,they value experience

Xiao-Mei: "You are meanest person I know"
Gabrielle: "I am THE meanest person. You've been in this country a year, modify your nouns dammit!"

Oh for God's sakes, Bree, you're a woman, manipulate him. That's what we do!

Do you know how bored I was today? I came this close to actually cleaning the house.

Pretty girls are never lonely

Gabrielle: (To a man in a wheelchair after taking a disabled parking spot) I have to walk in heels all day long. You get to sit in a chair and roll.

(Gabrielle jogs by. )

Lynette: "Fine, Gaby! Don't say hi!"
Gabrielle: "Hey! Cocktails? Nobody called me?"
Susan: "It was spur-of-the-moment. We're numbing the pain of... more