Roxy: Why do I have to have an occasion to spread the love?

Mason: Because you're an ornery bitch who eats puppy dogs for breakfast

George: "Do you have any crackers?"

Roxy: "You mean besides you?"

I ain’t got nothing’ but wrong jobs.

I will seriously fuck you up sir.

Roxy: [to Mason who is curled up on a bench at the diner and looking out the window] What's wrong with you?
[Mason blinks in her direction, eyes bloodshot]
Roxy: Are you stoned?
Mason: [looking... more

Betty: Oh, and always be nice to that lady at the DMV.

Roxy: I told that bitch that her weave looked like carpet, and now my social insurance number pulls up *two* bankruptcies!

[George is in a good mood one morning and Roxie doesn't like it]
Roxy: How about a hot cup of shut the fuck up?

Roxy: Nice Cross. How'd you get the blood off?

Daisy Adair: Oh easy, soap and water.

Roxy: [after Gravelings tried to drop something on her] You missed me, motherfuckers!

Roxy: So what are you, Rube's butt boy?

George: Why? Did you resign?