Experience has taught me that interest begets expectation, and expectation begets disappointment, so the key to avoiding disappointment is to avoid interest. A equals B equals C equals A, or... more

George: You really care how it's going with me?
Rube: Sure. I make my face look like this and concerned words come out.

Rube: You like spaghetti, George? I like spaghetti. I like board games. I like grabbing a trifecta with that longshot on top. That ozone smell you get from air purifiers. And I like knowing the space... more

Betty: We are on the flirting edge of nowhere with 10 miles to go, and I am wearing my Blahniks. Do you know how many people had to die for me to get these?
George: No.
Betty: Five. Five people had... more

Data Entry Guy: Files don't just disappear.

George: They do if you drop them down an elevator shaft.

George: [after intentionally missing an appointment to reap a soul] I forgot to tell you my last guy didn't show... just thought you'd like to know. What's the soup today?

Rube: Cream of bullshit.

DATA ENTRY GUY: It's your lunch hour. We'll see you back in 35.
GEORGE: If it's my lunch hour why is it only 35 minutes?
DATA ENTRY GUY: Oh 'cos they did some research like five years ago and I... more

George: Everyone says "live in the now," but that's bullshit. I mean, who lives in the moment? We're too busy thinking about what happens next... or what didn't happen at all.

Ray Summers: You're an angry little thing, aren't you?

George: You call me a "little thing" again, and I'll put this fucking dart right between your twinkling eyes!

Ray Summers:... more

George: "Do you have any crackers?"

Roxy: "You mean besides you?"