suspect: "I'm gonna own you. Yeah, I'm gonna own you. In fact, maybe I'll just move in here. I'm gonna live here."

Holly Gribbs: There were… bodies… I could feel them… breathing.

Grissom: It’s okay, Holly. It’s alright. (to dead bodies) You assholes!!

Grissom: If latex rubber and cooking spray went on a blind date, how would the night end?

Mandy Webster: A lot better than ours did.

Grissom: I know. Pink Floyd’s not your thing.

Mandy... more

Sara: (looking at coffins) So, when you buy one of these, for $10,000, it’s yours right?

Coffin Attendant: Well, of course it is.

Sara: No one else gets to use it...

Coffin Attendant:... more

Why is it you guys can never hit the bowl?"
"You know, if this guy took viagra, you're lucky he hit the floor and not the ceiling.

Somebody did their business right next to Jesus

Mandy: "Nice sword."

Catherine: "Mm hmm."

Mandy: "I dated a guy on the fencing team once. His thighs were incredible. (laughs) Did you want to show me... more

(Captain Brass and Catherine walk up to Lady Heather's house and knock on the door)

Lady Heather: "This isn't a good time."

Brass: "We have a warrant to search your house. And... more

Regina Owens(about some lingerie): You want one for the wife?
Grissom: I'm not married.
Owens: Girlfriend?
Grissom: Nope.
Ownes: Want one?
Grissom: Yes, I do. (Winks) I would also like a... more

Nick: "You need a girlfriend."

Archie: "You first."