Reid: Are you hacking into the government HMO database? Is that legal?
Garcia: Of course not. We'll go to prison and you'll become someone's bitch.
Reid: Really?

Hotch:"You told me you were clear to travel, you lied"
Prentiss:"Naughty boy"
Reid:"No I didn't, I am a doctor so technically it wasn't a lie"
Garcia:"What was it... more

[answering call] Office of Unfettered Omniscience - how may I help you, O fortunate one?

Morgan: Garcia, baby girl, please tell me something I want to hear.
Garcia: You are a statuesque god of sculpted chocolate thunder.
Morgan: How about something I don't already know?
Garcia: (after... more

Morgan: (on phone) Hey, girl, you’re on speaker – behave.
Garcia: Or what, you’ll spank me?

William Shakespeare wrote, love all, trust a few, do wrong by none.

Garcia: "I'm going to the loo, make sure no one takes my seat."
Prentiss: "I'll guard it with my life."

Garcia: Oh JJ, I was sitting at a bar with a cute guy from the Anti-Terrorist Unit drinking margiritas and was looking at second base when you called me so this better be good.
JJ: It's far from... more

Garcia: Are you lonely in the Lone Star state? And are you wearing chaps?
Morgan:: Only in your dreams, Garcia
Garcia:: Oh, not necessarily. I have photoshop.

JJ: You are the best ever.

Garcia: Aw, and you're the most perceptive