You can't snort a line of coke off a woman’s ass and not wonder about her hopes and dreams, it's not gentlemanly.

People... they don't write anymore - they blog. Instead of talking, they text, no punctuation, no grammar: LOL this and LMFAO that. You know, it just seems to me it's just a bunch of stupid people... more

Now you're giving me that look, right now, look like I fingerbanged your cat

Wine is fine but whisky's quicker

Hank Moody: Hell-A Magazine blog number 1. Hank hates you all. A few things I've learned on my travels through this crazy little thing called life. One, a morning of awkwardness is better than a... more

Oh, I don´t know.. I thought I´d start the day with some dry toast and half a grapefruit,maybe go for a run or maybe I´ll just jerk off and go back to bed

Hank: "I probably won't go down in history, but I will go down on your sister. While I'm down there it might be nice to see a hint of pubis. I'm not talking about a huge 70's playboy bush or... more

Don't tell me what to feel. All my fuckin' life people have been telling me I do things wrong, I'm always the fucking asshole, and I look around and I see everyone else is infinitely more fucked- up... more

Women know within the first few seconds of meeting a guy whether they want to marry him, fuck him or kill him.

I'm declaring a jihad on your pussy!