(After winning a trial, addressing the media): "So many questions. One at a time, I'm only human. Actually I'm not, I'm Denny Crane"

Denny Crane never goes down.... not unless it's in bed. I'm a giving lover.

Alan Shore: He reminds me of this inflatable bobo doll i had as a kid, i hated that thing. It didn't matter how many times i would smack it down, it would come right back up again. Mocking me... one... more