the best is when tobias goes " Hey where the fuck are my hard boiled eggs"
then puts his head down and walks away slowly

Tobias walks into the kitchen with a hunting vest on and a rifle on his shoulder. He says "Boy, did I get a lot of stares on the bus with this guy." classic.....

Best Tobias quote ever!!

Tobias: You know, first of all, we are doing this for her, okay, because neither one of us wants to get divorced. And second-of-ly, I know you're the big marriage expert. Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot. Your wife is dead!

Tobias: I'm sorry. That was 100% inappropriate, and I do apologize profusely. I'm ... oh.

hahahahahaha what an amazing show!!

"Even if it means me taking a chubby, I'm gonna suck it up"

--Tobias Funke

are you going to buy this time or are you just courios

tobias i supose im buy curious you see i have this big t.v. apperance

oh we get a lot of big t.v.s in here

tobias had the funniest lines

On his open marriage:
"But it MIGHT work for us..."
"Let the great experiment begin!"
"My schedule is as open as my relationship with my wife"

On his never-nudity:
"It may not be recognized here in the states, but there are two members of German Parliament who..."
to George Michael--"I'll NEVER understand?"
the spring break never-nude: "I didn't see you at the convention"
Tobias: "I was in Germany, but I teleconferenced in"

Does anyone want to go to the HOSPITAL?

To the high school principal: "Give me a chance to tell the Bard's tale"

And best of all--Tobias on Burger King: "It's a wonderful restaurant"

"Douche Chill"

Tobias: As you may or may not know, Lindsay and I have hit a bit of a rough patch.
Michael: Really? When did that start?
Tobias: Well, I don't want to blame it all on 9/11, but it certainly didn't help.