Simon: I don’t fell so good.
Matt: Neither does my car.

As (Hello) Kitty as my witness, I will never have another Valentines Day like this one!

Simon: I don’t fell so good.
Matt: Neither does my car.

You’re like the little boy who cried wolf except you’re the little boy who called love".

Matt: I'm gonna be... a gynaecologist.

Annie: Well, he does love women.

Matt: What's wrong with Luce?

Mary: God hates her.

Matt: Still? You'd think after 13 years he'd move on to someone else.

Matt: This is Bernie, Mary Camden's attorney.

Credit Card Collector: Mary Camden can't afford to pay a $50 bill but she has an attorney?

Matt: This is Bernie, Mary Camden's attorney.
Credit Card Collector: Mary Camden can't afford to pay a $50 bill but she has an attorney?

Eric: You know in some ways your mother hasn't changed since the day I married her over twenty years ago.
Matt: And in other ways?
Eric: She's mean. Really, really mean.

Matt: I'm gonna be... a gynaecologist.
Annie: Well, he does love women.